Writing Progress

A Snippet From The Sea Story

My crit buddy Kip tagged me to share a snippet from my work-in-progress, and since I’m well over the halfway mark now, I thought I might join in. You can see Kip’s snippet from her YA futuristic thriller (set in Iceland!) here.

The rules are as follows: “Search the words “moment,” “forever,” “time,” or the like in your writing, pick your favorite chunk, post on your blog, and tag others!”

Because the Sea Story is still an early, early draft, I’m going to break the rules and post the bit I’ve read more than once. This snippet is part of the first chapter as it currently stands, and the first time you hear from my protagonist, Anna.

Here it is:

 

Some people believe in souls. They believe every person is made up of two halves: The surface part, made of flesh and bone, and a deeper part, as wild and unknowable as the sea.

They believe that in death the two halves break, snap like a twig. One part stays below to rot or burn or be chopped up and distributed as donor organs, while the other part… well, I’d never been all that clear what happens to that other part.

Dad believed all those things, but as far as I could tell they didn’t help him a bit when he died.

The way I saw it, dead was dead, and gone was gone. The part of me that thought and loved and had nightmares each night was fueled by my still beating heart, and when the blood stopped flowing, the rest would, too.

But still, when I saw the first body, I couldn’t help but watch and wait with all the rest of them. Wait for the intake of breath that would never come. Wait to see some sort of clue that the corpse on the beach was once a living, thinking, dreaming person, and not just a shell for a long-departed soul.

 

So there you go!

I’m tagging Shari, JRo, and anyone else who wants to have a go. Hope you liked my snippet!

Rainy day in the PNW

Rainy day in the PNW

Categories: Sea Story, Writing Progress | 7 Comments

Flotsam and Jetsam

It’s been a little while since I posted last. In that time I’ve wallowed in a new story idea and I’ve completed another draft of Restless, which is now off with crit partners. This means I’ve got a bit of time on my hands, and it’s time to start making decisions about the Sea Story. I have my characters, my plot and my setting, but there is still one element I haven’t quite figured out. To me, it’s the most important part: Atmosphere.

All writers face the question, “Where do you get your ideas?” It’s a hard question to answer, because as far as I can tell, ideas are the flotsam and jetsam of the mind. They are the waste product after all your experiences, all the things you see and hear each day, have been sorted and cataloged in your brain. They are the mulch of our lives.

There are so many ways I could answer that question, but there is one answer I think would confuse people. I get my ideas from video games.

Not the core ideas, mind you. Not the plot or character or setting. But the most important part: Atmosphere.

I think I’ve mentioned before that I can’t start a story until I have the atmosphere down. The few times I’ve tried, I’ve lost interest in the story pretty quick. But honestly, I never knew this about myself until I discovered video games, or one video game in particular.

Now, I know I won’t be able to convince you to play the game itself, but here’s a sample of the music:

True, I could probably just listen to some music, but there is something so immersive about video games. In a way it’s like my post on wallowing. For a few hours, or a few days, you can get lost in this other world.

The game above was how I landed on the atmosphere for Restless. The video game I will be playing this weekend, and which I hope will help me nail down the atmosphere for the Sea Story, is called Heavy Rain. I think you can hear why:

And once I have my atmosphere, there will be nothing left but… to write!

I’m excited and nervous and I’m trying not to think of how long it will take me to write another book. A book is such a huge commitment. You really need to be sure. You have to know it’s the story you can live with for the next year or more. And the great thing? I’m certain. I’ve been unsure with other stories,  but not this one. THIS is the book I’m meant to write.

I just hope I can do it well.

P.S. For the curious among you, Flotsam and Jetsam are different kinds of shipwreck. I think that’s kind of apt, don’t you?

Categories: Music, Planning, Restless, Sea Story, Writing Progress | Leave a comment

The Voices In My Head

I have an interesting profession. Other than my colleagues, I’ve never met anyone who works at a private detective agency. I like seeing the surprised looks on people’s faces when I tell them what I do. It’s a lot more interesting than saying I work as a receptionist, which is what my last job was.

But, in the day to day, what I do for a living feels normal. Mundane even. It takes an odd case or a conversation with a stranger to make me pause and think “Wait. My job is actually kind of cool.” It’s moments like these that help me get through the other parts of my job: the boring bits and the stressful bits.

I think that’s why taking breaks is so important. Whether it’s taking a few days off work to get away for a bit, or taking a break from writing or querying, or whatever it is you do to work towards your dream.

I’ve spoken before about how hard it is for me to write at the same time as I submit. I think part of it is how many voices are there when you’re submitting: Agents, friends, critique partners, well-wishers, competition judges. I find it really difficult, after listening to those voices all day while I’m querying, to then sit down and listen to my own internal voice. It’s hard for me to block everything else out, the voices telling me I’m not good enough, or that my last book was fantastic, and what is this piece of rubbish? to just write.

Sometimes this makes me want to give up on the whole trying to get published thing. What I love about writing is the day to day, the putting words down on paper. I find the other stuff hard to deal with. But I have this dream of one day being able to quit that day job to write all day every day, and in order to get there, I need an agent, I need an editor and I need readers. All of these things a good things, GREAT things. I’d love to have people reading what I write one day. But it means I need to find a way to balance both the outside voices and my inner voices. To both write and submit. And I’ve come up with a few strategies.

The first is the Just For Fun project. I started writing it about a month ago, and I’m a third of the way through. I think I’ll finish before November. The great thing about a JFF project is there are no other voices. I’m not writing it with the goal of submission, so I can do whatever I want. It doesn’t matter if it’s horrible, it doesn’t matter if it’s utterly unsellable. It’s mine and mine alone. When I queried my first book I didn’t write a word for months, I was so paralyzed with doubt. Not a single word. The fact that I’ve written 20k in a month is a miracle.

The second thing is taking breaks. Querying is an intensive process, at least how I’ve been doing it. Sometimes I find myself getting so wrapped up in queries and competitions and blog posts that I start worrying about silly things like trends and putting sentences together if I ever have to talk to someone on the phone. Sometimes I need to take a step back, block out all the voices and learn to breathe properly again.

It’s like with my day job. Taking a break from the madness helps me to see the cool bits about querying. The full requests and the friendships made with other writers. The fact that I’ve written a book that some people think is GOOD. These are pretty awesome things, but when I’m neck-deep in queries I can lose sight of this. I can get lost in the stressful stuff and the exhausting stuff and the stuff that makes me want to curl up under my bed and never come out.

I’m starting to see that it’s all about balance. A balance of work and play. A balance of creativity and business. I used to say these things just don’t go together, but I think maybe they can. You just have to find your own strategies to make it happen.

So, to sum up, when you start hearing too many voices in your head, it’s time to take a step back. Or possibly see a mental health professional.

A place with no voices. Or at least less than are currently in my head.

Categories: NY Story, Restless, Writing Life, Writing Progress | 3 Comments

Life in Circles

Three years ago, in August of 2009, I started writing my first book. It was about a city and a murder and a young girl working towards her dream of becoming a journalist. And superheroes.

A few weeks ago I started writing my third book. I like to think of it as a spiritual successor to my first book, as it contains all the same elements as above while being completely and utterly different.

What is so beautifully, wondrously clear to me as I start this new story, in this new world, is how much I’ve grown as a writer.

Also about three years ago, I started this little ole’ blog. Almost every post back then was about some new element of craft that I’d learned. I was learning so much, so fast, and my story just couldn’t keep up with the growth. These types of posts have become more infrequent these days, but it’s not because I’ve stopped learning things. Quite the opposite. It’s because the things I’m learning now are harder to articulate.

Voice. The difference between the right word and the wrong one. Depth in character, beyond questionnaires and character worksheets.

Of course, I still have so much to learn. SO much. The beautiful thing about writing is that you’re always learning. Each story is its own beast, and it’s in the wrangling that you grow.

But being here, writing this story that I’ve already attempted once, that I tried to give up on again and again, that keeps weaseling its way back in, is like making it to the top of a small mountain and looking back at all the miles I’ve trod. I have so much further to go, so many more mountains to climb, but look! I’ve made it this far, and isn’t that amazing?

Sometimes in the deep, dark depths of an unruly draft, or while forgoing hygiene to revise that scene just one more time, it can feel like you’re making no progress at all. Sometimes when the rejections just keep coming and you’re stuck in some dead end job, working nights and weekends on a goal that looks like it may never come to fruition, you wonder if it’s really worth it. If maybe you’re wasting your time.

If I could go back to past-Beth in these moments I’d whisper in her ear: Yes.

Yes, you are making progress. You are learning and growing as a writer in a thousand different ways. You can’t see the big picture at the moment, but you will. You’ll round that last corner, climb that last hill, and there you are, at the top of a mountain.

It’s been three years since I decided I was going to finally sit down and write a book. I’m not published yet. I haven’t made my goal. But there have been milestones, big and small. And today I stand on top of a mountain, looking back on all the steps I’ve taken, and reader? I’m feeling pretty fine.

***

I chose this picture to end the post not because it was related at all, but because it makes me smile. My friend Raech and her favourite animals. Also, Raech was one of my first ever readers. She’s been there from the beginning and she’s always been enormously encouraging to me. Thanks, Raech!

Ducks!

Categories: NY Story, Writing Life, Writing Progress | 2 Comments

New Beginnings

One of my favorite things about writing is that there is always a new story to tell. There are always new worlds to explore, new characters to journey with. You’re never truly done, because there is always more to do.

I’ve started a new story. This is both wonderful and terrifying. Wonderful because I love this world. I love these characters and I can’t wait to tell their story. Terrifying because in this business there are no guarantees. I could spend a year or more working on this story, and the market may shift. Another book just like it might come out. There is no way to know if this book will ever sell.

New beginnings are all about faith. That first step, that wonderful, terrifying step into the fog, is an act of faith. You never know where the journey might lead you. Should I have written that idea instead of this one? Should I have started somewhere different? Will anyone ever read this? Am I wasting my time?

I don’t think you can ever answer these questions. The questions you can answer are: Am I passionate about this story? Will I see it through to the end? Am I okay if no one ever reads it? Am I stretching myself? Is there anything else I would rather do?

It’s the answers to these questions that are really important. It’s the answers to these questions which really determine if that first step is worth taking. And for me it is. Now and always.

I want to be the person that tries, even if that means I will fail.

So, those are just a few thoughts I’ve had while starting my new novel :)

3078 / 70000 words. 4% done!
Oh, you want to know what the new project is about? I’ll give you a hint:

As I’m learning more and more about protecting the copyright of other creatives, and I have so much respect for DC Comics, I’ve taken the picture down. But you can find it here: http://media.dcentertainment.com/sites/default/files/files/2010/02/flsv2_6pp_prev-4-copy.jpg
Categories: NY Story, Writing Life, Writing Progress | 2 Comments

An Easter Retrospective

It’s fun to look back at the year that was. Last year, just before Easter, I wrote this post: Easter Writing Marathon.

I had big plans that Easter. I was about 12k into my new novel (the one that would become Restless) and I was hoping to hit 20k. That didn’t happen. Despite my wonderful plans, I came down with the flu really, really badly. I spent most of Easter sleeping or playing video games while coughing up all sorts of disgusting things.

This Easter I’m in a fairly similar place. I’m just starting a new novel and I’m planning to spend Easter racking up the word count. But this time, I’m prepared. I’ve been drinking plenty of orange juice and taking vitamins, and I WILL NOT get sick  this time.

In a month or to I’ll be querying that novel I was writing last Easter. I wonder if next Easter I’ll be querying this one?

I love that I did eventually write that 20k I was hoping for. In fact, I made it to 77k. I love that no matter what challenges have come across my path in the last year, I worked hard and achieved what I set out to do. Yay me!

What were you doing this time last year? What have you achieved since then, and how have your goals changed?

Portland, Maine

Categories: Life, Restless, Writing Progress | Leave a comment

Lost In Revisions

I’m not all that good at writing short blog posts, but I’m going to give it a try, because I am deep, deep, deep in revisions. What, you thought I was done? Not quite. I finished my second draft and wrote ‘The End’ for the first time, which was huge, but although I now have a bookish looking thing, I still have quite a bit of smoothing to do.

Have you ever heard of Chekhov’s gun? Basically: If you place a gun on the wall in the first chapter, it must go off before the end. I like to think of a book as being made up of hundreds of threads. My job at this stage is to make sure each thread is present throughout the whole novel, and are all woven in nicely.

So while this draft isn’t as comprehensive as the last, it’s all about DETAILS, which is quite brain-consuming. There is never a moment in which I’m not thinking about my novel. If I’m talking to you and suddenly start staring off into space, it’s probably because I suddenly realized I lost a character somewhere around chapter four. Or, I forgot to mention an important item of back story which helps the protagonist live through the climax. Or maybe I need more moths (there are a lot of moths in this story). Also, this novel is kind of creepy, so you can imagine the kind of dreams I’ve been having.

One good thing about being at this stage is I’m really seeing the novel take shape. It’s kind of gorgeous, really. I set out to achieve something I didn’t even know if I was capable pulling off, but step by step I plodded along, and now I’m really seeing all my hard work pay off. I love this novel. Love, love, LOVE. It’s the best thing I have ever written and I’m terribly hopeful for its future.

So, forgive me, friends, colleagues, randoms on the internet. I am deep in revision territory and it may be a couple of weeks before I surface. But when I do, I may have a shiny new manuscript for you to enjoy! :)

Revision = foggy brain.

Categories: Restless, Revision, Writing Progress | 2 Comments

In Which I Become A Brunette

So on Friday something that never happens happened. Every part of my life came together to perfectly create the ideal writing environment. Firstly, I had an insanely good nights sleep on Thursday night (this is a rare and beautiful occurrence). Then I got off work four hours early (whee!). Thirdly, we had an abundance of coffee in the house, and because it was a Friday night I could have as much as I wanted (three cups all up)(No, I didn’t sleep much).

So I sat down at my laptop and made a deal with Twitter/The Universe. If I could finish my draft in one long writing marathon, I would dye my hair.

This is what I look like today:

Sorry for the Facebook shot, folks!

I think I look like Katniss. Agree? Maybe this will help:

Today has been celebration day because I finally, finally, finally wrote “The End” on my novel (you will remember I left the ending hanging in my first draft because there was so much I wanted to change that the original ending would no longer make sense).

My lovely friend Lena (who played Rory to my Lane in the great hair dyeing experiment) brought me flowers and Frosty Fruit ice blocks (I love you, Lena!) to help celebrate.

Please ignore our lunch dishes...

And I slept in, which never happens. And I unpacked my books onto the floor because I do not yet have bookcases.

Books!

For the rest of the weekend I plan to play video games. I so rarely have time, but I do love it so. In the last break between novels I played Alan Wake, and you will see how this influenced Restless when you read it (which I promise you will). I don’t know how Uncharted will influence my next novel as they are in no way alike, but you never know…

I’m taking the rest of this week off to celebrate and recoup, but I’ll be back next week for another read through (note to self: must buy post-its). Not thinking about that yet, though, because I FINISHED MY NOVEL!!!

Categories: Life, Restless, Writing Progress | 5 Comments

A Girl and Her Pen: A Love Story

Next week The Husband and I are going away to celebrate our four year wedding anniversary, and it’s got me thinking about relationships and what it takes to make them work.

A couple of weeks ago I found myself getting frustrated with the writing. I wrote in my last post about unrealistic expectations, and that’s part of what’s been troubling me, but it goes further than that. Writing is a lot like a relationship, and I hadn’t been treating it very well.

You guys know I’m a lover of lists, so you won’t be surprised the first thing I did was make a list of ways to mend my relationship with the pen. This is what I came up with:

- Take it slow. There can be a lot of external pressure when you’re in a relationship. Everyone has an opinion about when you should reach the major milestones. When you should get engaged, how long the engagement should be, and isn’t it time you start giving us grandkids? It’s when you internalise this pressure that things start going wrong. Whenever I read about someone submitting a query, getting an agent, publishing a book, I get impatient. I want to be there NOW. But what I need – what my writing needs – is to take thing slow.

- Personal space. When you’re in love – with a person, or with your story – you want to spend every last second together. This isn’t always a good thing, though. The Husband and I love spending time together, but we each have our own hobbies as well. We’ve found that spending time apart makes the moments we do spend together even more special. When I spend too much time in the world of my story I find myself going a little crazy. It becomes hard to see the big picture, where I’m heading, when I’m buried in a single scene, or paragraph. Sometimes the absolute best thing I can do for my writing is have a break, be it an hour, a day, or even a week. This past week my husband and I moved house and it was the perfect time for a break from my writing. In fact, in a week of not writing I’ve had more ideas for the story than I’ve had in months of slaving away over my keyboard. I’m able to come at things fresh, with a bit of perspective, and I’m so, so excited to jump back in.

- Celebrate milestones. I’ve mentioned this one before, but I think it’s really important. For our wedding anniversary, The Husband and I are going to a swanky hotel in the Blue Mountains and eating at our favourite restaurant of all time. It just so happens that the town we’re visiting is the one that inspired the town from my story, and the hotel we’re staying in plays a major role in the plot. This will be the third time I’ve visited the Blue Mountains since I came up with the idea for this story and it’s always such an inspiring time. It will do me and my story good to go back to where it all began, and celebrate the journey so far.

- Plan for the future. This one can be tricky, as dreaming and planning can turn into pressure if you’re not careful, but they’re still so important. The Husband and I love to talk about the future. About things we’d like to do, places we’d like to see. A lot of our plans aren’t in our control, but they’re important to think about. They give you things to aim for and they give you a gentle shove when you’re going through hard times. When I read those stories about other writers getting agents, I have to work at not letting myself feel pressured, but I also find them inspiring. It’s something to aim for, to dream about. Writing and I have a big future together and I need to keep being open and hopeful.

- Dating is important. When you’ve been married for a while you can find yourself getting in a rut of work and laundry and dishes. It’s important to remind yourself you’re not living with a housemate, you’re living with the love of your life. You need to take time to do special things together like go to the movies, eat out, or even window shop. For me, writing is the same. BICHOK, or Butt In Chair, Hands On Keys, is the serious writer’s mantra, but if that’s all you do, you can find yourself getting burnt out. Sometimes it’s good to write something just for fun. On Saturdays I like to have a writing date at a local cafe (I’ll have to find a new one now that I’m living in the ‘burbs), just me and my laptop, sipping tea and tapping on the keyboard. Not because I have to but because it’s fun.

- Choose wisely. Now, this one doesn’t quite apply to me at the moment, but it’s something I think about a lot when I’m starting a story. Writing a novel takes a really long time. Sure, you can always break up if it isn’t working, but it’s so much easier if you take time in the beginning to evaluate – is this the right story for you? Will you be happy with this story? Does it inspire you, challenge you, make you want to be a better writer? Luckily, the answers to those questions are all ‘yes’ for Restless. And now that I’ve chosen this story and I’m working hard to make my vision a reality, it’s important for me to reflect on what made me say ‘yes’ to begin with.

So now that I’ve given myself relationship counseling with my writing, it’s time for me to dive back in. I have my oreos. I have my coffee. I have my new only-partially-set-up office. I have the thunderstorm gathering outside my window. So I’m going to go write.

After a week off, here’s where the word count is up to:

 

35000 / 70000 words. 50% done!

 

Halfway there. I think that’s worth celebrating :)

Where I'm going next weekend

 

Categories: Restless, Writing Progress | 2 Comments

Best Books of 2011

So I sat down to write my “Best Books of 2011″ post and I realized I was going to have a little trouble. You see, I didn’t write down the books I read last year, and I’m having trouble remembering them. Then again, maybe that’s part of the weeding-out process: If I can remember them after all this time, they have to be pretty good, right?

It was a tumultuous year for book buying and reading for me. My go-to bookstore closed. I got a full-time job. I traveled overseas for two months. But I did still manage to read a fair bit. In fact, when we returned from our trip we had an extra suitcase, entirely filled with books.

So without further ado, my Best Books of 2011 list:

1. The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvater

Ever since I first picked up Shiver in a bookstore and read the first few lines, I’ve been a huge Maggie fan. There’s something to be said for making language invisible, but as a writer I sometimes like to pick up a book and just roll around in the beautiful words. For those who don’t know, Maggie is terribly talented at many things. She was first published in her early 20s, after having worked full time as a portrait artist. The thing I admire most about her is how much better she gets with each book. The Scorpio Races is her very best yet. I read it while driving from San Francisco to Los Angeles on Highway 1, which might be the best possible place to read this book. Cliffs, beaches, the fear of imminent death… what more do you need? I couldn’t tell you. I thought it was perfect.

2. Imaginary Girls by Nova Ren Suma

I don’t read much contemporary YA literature, and I’m not sure this one even counts, but it makes me want to read more. I loved the restraint Nova showed in not giving us all the answers. I loved the chapter headings. I loved the sense of mystery and foreboding. I loved the lake, and all its stories. I admit I was surprised by how much I loved this book, but it left a deep impression. It makes me want to reach deeper and become a better writer, as all good books do. Unsettling and beautiful: Just my kind of story.

3. Ship Breaker by Paolo Bacigalupi

When I was younger I just gobbled up post-apocalyptic fiction. It was my favorite kind of story. Back then these books were relatively hard to find, and I pretty much just read my Isobelle Carmody novels over and over again. Then came the YA boom, and vampires, and finally post-apocalyptic overload. It seems like every second book is about the end of the world. You would think this would be exciting for me, but unfortunately I haven’t found too many that live up to the quality I like. So while book after book was released, I’ve kind of sat back and waited for the cream to rise to the top. The Hunger Games was cream. Ship Breaker is definitely cream. What I like about it: The completely different setting. So many post-apocalyptic worlds these days seem interchangeable, but this one is completely and totally unique. It’s believable and beautiful and heartbreaking. Also, the writing is magnificent. It’s more restrained than Stiefvater, but it’s another one I could just roll around in. The character voices were so unique and the world just made my brain spin. I loved it, loved it, loved it.
Aside: I read this while driving through the desert towards the Grand Canyon, which is thematic if not accurate.

4. Daughter of Smoke and Bone

You know when everyone tells you you should read something and that rebellious side of you rears its ugly head and you find yourself resisting? Everyone has always told me how wonderful Laini Taylor is, but this is the first time I’ve actually given her a go. Somehow I thought if she was such a fantastic author, the kind who won awards and whose books made it on prestigious lists, then maybe her stories were more educational than entertaining. Wow, I was wrong. I am so glad I finally picked this book up. I read Daughter while in Montreal (which, by the way, might be the perfect place to read it if you can’t make it all the way to Prague) and my traveling companions actually had to drag me out of the car to see the city. All I wanted to do was curl up with this book forever and ever. Which might be why I was so mad when it ended. Warning: Daughter is the first in a series. Its ending isn’t really an ending. But other than that: So, so good. My favorite part was voice. Let me tell you, Laini Taylor has voice just leaking from her pores. Love, love, love.

Honorable mention:

The Name of the Star by Maureen Johnson

The only reason I can’t add this as a full entry is that I haven’t finished reading it yet. I bought it just before the end of 2011 and have been slowly savoring it since. I can’t tell you if the book is fantastic, because you never know, it could totally fall over in the back half, but the first 100 pages have totally hooked me. I love atmosphere and I love a good mystery, and this book has both in spades.

 

So, how goes my own book, you ask? Pretty good! New Years slowed me down a bit, as did going back to work, but I’m still over my goal, so cheers to that!

Here’s where I’m at currently:

30000 / 70000 words. 43% done!

 

I’m hoping to get to 50% by the end of the weekend, so I better get hopping!

Lately I’ve found myself getting unreasonably annoyed at this manuscript for not being done yet. Unreasonable, because I started writing Restless not even 12 months ago. By this time with my last novel I hadn’t even finished the first draft. Last time it took me six months to revise. I’ve been working for four weeks and I’m almost halfway there.

I don’t know where our unreasonable expectations come from, but I think when you find them you need to kick them in the arse. It doesn’t matter that such-and-such writes two books a year. Such-and-such isn’t writing the same story as you. Her life and process are completely different. What matters is your story, and what it needs. What matters is putting your best effort it, day after day. Nothing else.

I need to remember to pat myself on the back for my achievements, and I suppose this blog is one way I do that. I love my story, I’m making good progress and I’m doing my very best. Those things deserve celebrating.

So how will you celebrate your achievements today? And how do you keep your expectations in check? Are there any fantastic books you read last year that you think I should read?

Happy weekend all!

 

Categories: Favorite Books, Restless, Writing Progress | 2 Comments

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